Tuesday, 28 September 2010

All The Pretty Dishes

This blog seems to have one steady reader in my friend T, one reasonably frequent reader in my school-buddy N, and occasional readers who flit through every now and then but have been kind enough to subscribe to the feeds. I seldom hear from anyone but the first two, but when I do I'm happy to say I mostly hear nice things. It is a bit galling, therefore, when an impertinent twerp I've met once takes a cursory look at the blog, uninvited, and informs me that my blog is a failure because it lacks the most important component of recipe blogs--a beautiful, food-pornesque, made-for-marketing layout.

Although from my ivory tower I make a habit of royally ignoring such twits, it occurs to me that perhaps I didn't broadcast my mission statement loud and clear, and people less a-twitter about my layout might have expectations from this blog that will never be met. So, let's have an honest mouth-to-ear about what this blog is, and emphatically is not.

This blog is not fancy. It is not sexy. The knowledge of this blog will not enhance your strike rate with desirable people. The author of this blog does not understand calorie-counting. This blog does not aspire to and shall not one day be made into a glossy (or shoddy) cookbook. This blog, being a non-entity written by a non-entity, will never make buckets, or even teaspoons of money from advertisments. Consequently, this blog is unlikely to receive chain-store sponsorship-cuddles, preventing it from giving away dressy, expensive kitcheware on first Sundays of all months beginning with the letter Q.

What this blog IS, is a compilation of recipes for people of straitened or stretched means. It uses cheap, ordinary and fresh, unprocessed ingredients usually available on both sides of the Atlantic. It is an useful guide to feeding yourself well, without shelling out half your income on dining-outs and ordering-ins. Although it snorts contemptuously at diet-food and keeps a respectful distance from the vegan lifestyle, it tickles your tastebuds and keeps you healthy, provided you get out and about a bit and don't rest your pretty posterior in front of a computer all day long (as the author of this blog does).

This blog also believes in an energy- and fashion-efficient kitchen, simply because aforementioned author is not used to anything else. All behind-the-scenes washing-up is done by hand, using minimum water. All utensils are made of unpretty but dead practical steel or cast-iron, and everything required can be covered under: wok, skillet, saucepan, metal strainer, good sharp knife, wooden spatula, perforated metal spatula (a speciality of cultures that deep-fry often and don't use kitchen towels to soak excess oil), and maybe a cutting board+potato peeler.

Now that we've made the nature of this blog unmistakably explicit, please tailor your expectation to it. And if your concern for my electronic 'success' tempts you to advise me on designers I should hire and marketing firms that will cut me a good deal to make this blog go viral... be so good as to sod off.


Anonymous said...

Bah bah! (The Bangla bah, that is, not the English one.) Besh bolechho! Ki moja!

BTW, I was unaware of the design/layout (or lack thereof) of your blog, because of Google Reader.

ps: Regrading halooming and stalking up and down at the foot of the bed while wearing leather footwear - how it is coming along?

Rimi said...

S--mojata? :O I am most annoyed! Perhaps because halooming is not coming along well at all, and stalking-type leather footwear is in short supply.

Speaking of halooming, I need to Enquire About A Young Person. Please be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed when online tomorrow.

Dea-chan said...

Well damn, you're missing out on all the opportunities, now that the first Sunday of Qoctober is coming up this weekend!

... Although I am a bit surprised that you felt that kind of comment was worth replying to. Hells, did I tell you that I have a follower on my blog? He's batshit crazy (as in, wants to live in a bunker). :-P

Rimi said...

He badgered and badgered and badgered me till I snapped just a little. Some people can never take a hint when you tell them "no thank you" to their faces :P

You'd better stay away from people who want to live in bunkers, girl. There's no telling who he'd like for company. Girls who can cook and sew and pickle and sing are in particularly high demand :D

dipali said...

I lurk around quite often,Rimi, even though I'm a vegetarian, and I love this blog of yours. Why are you ignoring the other one?

Rimi said...

Because I'm lazy, Dipali :D I'll try to be back next back, and thank you for the blog-love!

therapy said...

Thukpa.... Dear me, you must come visit here. And use my oven. how about a quick cake soon?